Lucky Mom

Jul. 3, 2006

Weird Stuff - Part II

O.k. it’s time for Weird Stuff - Part II, I think.

As you’ll recall from Weird Stuff - Part I, I apparently have several idiosyncrasies (I like to say ‘exotic preferences' or some other sexy word combo) - things I pretty much consider normal but apparently not everyone does.

This small collection is geared more toward my GROSS factor as it's been on the rise lately for some reason.

As Lucky Mom reader Joni noted (and reminded me) in Weird Stuff - Part I, she has to replace her kitchen sponges weekly. Thanks to Costco and my ample storage space, I do too! Thanks Joni for the reminder! As my husband knows, I hate ‘bacteria’.

O.k. so to start off this collection of items, I have to first tell you how mortified I was last weekend when my husband and I decided to take Alec for a bike ride on a nice Seattle bike trail.

(I won’t discuss here how said husband was almost slain by pregnant wife due to the lack of peeing facilities promised on a stretch of lane wife had never ridden before but was absolutely sworn to have ‘plenty’ for. Plenty for whom?? A man or a six months pregnant woman with a small bladder?)

Anyway, I went to fill up our water bottles and after having to pry my husband’s out of his bike bottle holder, I noticed how black and sticky the MOUTH SUCKING AREA was with crusted-on goop!

Gross! I swear I almost vomited, especially when he told me he hadn’t washed it since last year! (and he rides his bike to work several times a week). DOESN’T EVEN RINSE IT OUT!

Anyway, here’s a few more:

  1. Spitting into bathroom sink (typically after brushing teeth) AFTER the water has already been shut off. HOW is the spit supposed to get DOWN the drain if there’s no water to assist? Yuck.
  2. The smell of urine (this one has been even more intensified by my son using the potty now) as while assisting my son with his pants, my head is dangerously close to the awful smelling toilet bowl. And public toilet bowls? Good Lord.
  3. Placing suitcases on MY bed? Do you know where those things have rolled and through what?
  4. People spitting on the sidewalk or pretty much anywhere I am a witness to this. (I’m sure many suitcases have rolled through that ground treasure.)
  5. Airplane bathroom FLOORS. You know your pants are grazing someone’s pee on the floor unless you have mastered the art of rolling your pants down your body first so when you pull them down to do your business, they still won’t hit the floor.
  6. I hate cardboard in the refrigerator. You know the soda, beer or other items that come neatly packaged in space-hogging cardboard containers. All contents must be immediately emptied and cardboard disposed of.

O.k. enough for now. This collection appears to be pretty pee/spit focused. Sorry.

8 Comments Posted (Add Yours)

1

that is too funny! when we were at Whistler a few years ago, my husband tried to lend me his camel back (a pouch of water you wear on your back, same type of top that you suck to get the water out as a water bottle (sort of)) I could immediately smell the dirt and ick on it! yuck! I had just met his best friend but that didn't keep me from ranting on as to how unbelievably gross he was, I think "pig man" came out of my mouth.
also, my son was playing with water in the sink and there were some plastic cups he had used before sitting waiting to be played with again. he takes a sip of one and says "yummy water mommy", I immediately cringe, there should not have been anything in those cups. I took it away and dumped it out and some goo was at the bottom of the water, god knows what that was. even just retelling it i feel like gagging! yuck!
i'll leave you with my favorit..... those talented individuals that can close one nostril and snort out a big ol' snot ball onto the sidewalk or wherever! and just keep walking, you know your suitcase has grased that lovely treasure! and i don't know if it's an urban legend or what, but what about the parent that sucks the snot out of thier infants nose?????? oh god, how can that be?
i feel ill, gotta go.

2

Yeuk! How about the way that milk in plastic containers gets dry and crusty under the cap. Then when you take the cap off it sprinkles all over the counter – yuck!

3

Joni - I didn't wanted to mention the snot thing as just writing/thinking about it makes me very close to hurling! Really, really close. Thanks gal.

4

Christian - that's why we only buy cartons now! Funny how that would bug you but water bottle crusted goop on mouthpiece doesn't. Huh.

5

If you want your sponges to last a little longer, you can microwave them for a minute and then throw them in the dishwasher. I was grossed out to find my sister-in-law wiping her toddler's face with an old,smelly sponge. Yuck!

6

How about those primitive "Turkish or Greek toilets"...you know, the hole in the ground? Yeah...I managed to master them pretty well, but had more than one pee splattering on the back of my legs episode. If I get squeemish (sp) around some of our 'lovely' park toilets, I just recall my travelin' days.

7

Oh I HATE spitting on the side walk!!!!!! And of course public bathrooms!!!! Everytime I go to one, I have to do a million turnups on my jeans so that they don't touch all the crap on the floor!!!!!

8

Being on planes frequently, I realized long ago the need to ALWAYS roll up my pant legs before using an airline bathroom. It's so disgusting and always smelly in there.