Lucky Mom

May. 11, 2010

Senior Citizen Dating

My 71.66 year old mother is dating.

It’s kinda weird. No, its just weird. She’s trying all the options; Match.com, eHarmony, senior speed dating and various other senior dating strategies.

Technology has changed singles way of dating and this includes seniors.

What might have been a wheelchair rally up to the dining table at the old folks home, or church bingo has now expanded into modern, hip and new methods…..the elders log on like the rest of us and check their ‘matches’.

They set up their screen dating names, many times fictitious and check each other out.

My mother came over the other day, logged on and showed me her 'Winks', 'Hello’s', 'You’re cutes' and 'Contact me’s'. It was moderately disturbing as there were men from the late 50’s to late 80’s.

After making some pained facial expressions, I had to remember, this is my mother and yes, she is older than me.

Interestingly, she would quickly dismiss most of them much to my chagrin.

She would automatically eliminate smokers, out of staters, moustaches, democrats, Texas accents (?) and dog owners. That pretty much cut most of the eligible candidates.

I told her she is too old to be that picky. She said “Too bad”.

She wins, it’s her gig.

Several have made her cut however but she repeatedly suggests iHop as the first date.

I don’t know why and apparently neither does she. Maybe because the competition at iHop isn’t steep; most the patrons are cranky seniors (as I found when I took my 6 year old there recently).

I wonder what the staff at iHop think of my mother coming in with a different man every other day or so. Do you think she's developed impressive senior dating street cred or just a bad reputation?

Anyway, this senior dating system doesn’t seem to be actually working out for many of the same reasons it doesn’t for younger folks.

My mother was unhappy with one nice fellow because he called her ‘beautiful’ and insisted on paying for lunch. He also opened the door for her. The audacity! Didn't he know 'she can do it herself' and that 'she doesn't need a man'?

I asked if she’d rather he call her ‘bit*h’ or ‘ho bag’ and she said no. So what, he’s just too nice?

Another potential was to meet my mother (evidently not at iHop) and she got lost. She couldn’t find the non-iHop rendezvous spot, got annoyed and simply went home without so much as a phone call to advise him.

He was upset she stood him up. Her response? “I didn’t like him anyway”! ??

I’m not sure what my mom is looking for because frankly, neither does she.

She just left on a week-long cruise with some girlfriends.

I’m sure that be much more fun for her anyway…..just like my younger, single girlfriends.

5 Comments Posted (Add Yours)

1

Great post, LM! Reminds me why I aborted internet dating. I suck at it too!

2

OMG, Liz sounds just like me, only older, when it comes to the reasons why the online goods are not so good. I have actually used all of the same reasons for not pursuing online matches, execpt for the TX accent, (uh, does she realize where she lives?). Hilarious post, KO.

3

Yikes.

I say forget the men, enjoy more of those cruises and take her besties to iHop :)

4

Candy - I think she only goes to iHop with potential suitors! Go figure! : )

5

I am new at this..looking for a Christian Sr.
with enough retirement money to have fun with.
I am fairly good looking.blonde woman with values

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