Lucky Mom

May. 4, 2009

Beating Up Burglars

Having lived in Seattle for many years single with no children, I tended to live in the city and loved the trendy spots where you could walk out your cool apartment door and hit the coffee shop or organic market.

I always felt safe as there were so many people milling around that though you'd encounter ‘bums’ on the street, you’d merely give them a buck, tell them to have a nice day and hope he or she got themselves a nice beer with the dough.

My girlfriend however, was not so lucky recently. She lives in a cool, view apt, less than a block from one of my old (and many) residences.

She also lives on the 3rd floor.

Apparently, that didn’t scare a ‘professional burglar’.

Apparently, at 7:30am on a Friday (hello, work day, people are up getting ready for work or hitting the bus stops) a burglar scaled the side of her building and entered her modest living quarters.

She happened to get up and walk in on the black donned burglar who had nothing to grab but her old $100 laptop.

She discusses it on her blog .

So, after kicking the sh*t out of him, he fled, shaking and fumbling to escape her craziness madness.

Now, I get that I’d be pretty upset that some random guy is kyping my computer, but to beat him up? Plus, she mentioned he had nice, lush black hair. What if he was hot? She's single. Just saying.

My friend is not a large, burly chick. She’s a 5 ft. 4 inch, 120 lb gal with perfectly manicured nails. I’m surprised he didn’t take her down with one firm swat.

I think (though do you ever really know until you’re in the situation) I would have handed him my purse and a bottle of wine and promptly scooted out the door before freaking out and screaming bloody murder for help.

Interestingly, not soon after, they caught the ‘professional’.

What a dumbass. Couldn’t he have chosen a more strategic time, say 3:00am? And the 3rd floor? What’s wrong with say, the first two floors? And he gets his ass kicked by some petite, middle aged woman.

You almost wonder if it wasn’t a dare or fraternity prank.

3 Comments Posted (Add Yours)


Thanks for the plug, LM. And I especially appreciate the sugar coated reference to my "modest" apt (a.k.a. the ugliest building on Queen Anne) and shaving off a good 10lbs from my middle aged figure. Keep up the good work!


Wow! I remember one of the apts. you lived in Seattle - CUTE!! That is scary! I am impressed! Way to go Wander Woman!!


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