Lucky Mom

Sep. 8, 2006

I’ve Been Dumped

I think Alec has broken up with me. I’m sad though happy he’s found someone something else to make him happy.

I don’t mean to beat a dead horse but this preschool thing is quite thought provoking. It such a normal part of life I’m sure. Your kid goes to school. Everyone does it.

But I’m finding it odd to have to get over not knowing exactly what Alec does every minute of the day.

I’m used to knowing when/how/what he pooped, exactly what he consumed, how many calories, fat and carbs and what he played with. How many ounces of milk/juice/water he had. How many times did he go down the slide? Did he go the potty by himself? Did he cry for any reason?

I think he became a bit bored with me after all this time and I can understand.

Especially being very pregnant, I couldn’t do all the same things with him as I could before. I couldn’t chase him through all the little tunnels at the playground or throw him up on the ‘big mountain’ at the mall play area.

I could take him to the grocery store and I could take him shopping and to my nail appts.

He never complained though I think he may have been rolling his eyes silently wishing he could do what other kids get to do.

Yesterday when I went to pick him up at school (early, to get a glimpse of what he was doing) he dragged me to circle time saying ‘come to circle mommy’. He wanted to show me about this circle time thing. I was proud of his independence and yet a bit sad that he enjoys these things now without me.

Then, to my amazement, he didn’t want to leave. It was time to go. (I think he didn’t understand why he had to go when the other kids were all staying – after school care for working parents). He started crying and walked back IN the classroom wanting to join in with the other children.

I dragged him out to the car kind of in shock. He didn’t want to come with me; he wanted to stay at school.

Same thing pretty much happened today. All he could talk about on the way home was when he could ‘go back to school mommy?

I’m going to have to start the mourning process. It really is over between us.

5 Comments Posted (Add Yours)

1

Now Mommy, it is just because he is in the Honeymoon stadge with his "school" relationship. It's new, he has new friends, new stuff to do, new faces everyday. It is different than when he was with you. To him it's exciting. What we do everyday isn't to them. Remember, little ones are sponges and they thrive on stimilous! He is definately getting it there! However, no one, I mean NO ONE will ever replace Mommy to Alec. He couldn't carry on without you. Right now he is just enamored with his new school. He will soon be excited again to retreat back to Mommy when you come to pick him up. He will call out "Mommy" and run to you. Your heart will melt and all will be returned to normal. Don't take it personally, his has just found a new "girlfriend" temporarily and he'll soon dump her and return to his "true love"....Mommy.
Hang in there. Just think the next delima will be when he actually DOES get a girlfriend what will you do then?? For that matter what will I do then? I have two Boys! Oh Gawd, now look what you have started!

2

I feel for you, but don't worry, this is normal. He may go in stages, just to warn you. One day, you may go to drop him off and he may start screaming for you to not leave him, but if you make a quick exit, he'll be fine within seconds and then when you go to pick him up, same thing, he won't want to leave again. Kaylee just started preschool again this week and day 1 and 2, she cried so hard when we dropped her off, but when I picked her up, she didn't want to go. By today, she was fine with getting dropped off and fine with leaving when it was time. It's just and adjustment period for her. I'm happy for Alec that he is enjoying his teachers and new friends. And for you to be getting a little alone time is good too. Take care!!!

3

I hadn't thought of school as being in the honeymoon stage but it makes sense. Oh God, I hope he doesn't get bored with it too quickly!

Always good to hear from moms who have been there! Thanks.

4

Think of it this way: you must have done a pretty good job since your son is obviously able to socialize, to be independent and is willing to learn. When he does well in a new "world", why not pat yourself on the shoulders?

5

I'm so glad Alec is adjusting so well! Congratulations. I've felt the loss of my little baby (boy) ever since he started saying "please" and acting like a little man. I miss the baby, but love the little man! Enjoy watching Alec grow, he will by leaps and bounds!